What is the most prized quality of a coach? Experienced players, coaches, the research and common sense all agree, the ability to communicate effectively is the most important skill for a coach to possess. Communication skills help good coaches to get better and allow players to make breakthroughs. Communication is the key skill for business executives and is also the key for successful relationships. This month we will look at how improving your coaching communication skills can improve the motivation of your players.

What Does a Great Coach Sound Like?
At the recent Washington State Fair former National Team Coach Tony DiCicco gave an example of how coaches can communicate effectively. Tony was working with a group of young women he had just met. The first thing I observed is that he learned their first names and used them immediately. The use of first names is important because you can make immediate connections with people. It was evident Tony was coaching people and not techniques. Every verbal communication was directed to an individual with intent. There were little wasted words. In fact, there was often silence as the players experienced the skill. The flow of the skill was left uninterrupted as the women experienced the game.

What Does a Great Coach Look Like?
How much of our communication are words? Only about 30%. That means that 70% is non-verbal, such as facial expression, gesture and posture. You can say a lot with your body and it's easier to communicate. The French national team coach Aime Jacquet gave a fantastic session in Philadelphia in February coaching a group of U-15 boys. He was energetic, clear and the boys learned from a coaching master. The trick was, Aime didn't speak English. He communicated with his face and hands with a great deal of precision in his demonstrations. We often over-coach by providing too many words players forget which results in boredom. The great coaches pick their words very carefully and use them sparingly. As well, great coaching can utilize strong non-verbal communication to help learning and self-confidence.

The Use of Humor?
Another striking observation from the Washington Fair is that Tony DiCicco is very funny. Yes, Tony utilized humor frequently to guide the training session. Tony had both the coaches and players at ease and paying attention. When players are relaxed and focused they learn and perform better. The use of humor is important in communication because people are drawn to pleasant interactions. This session was held in a hotel ballroom with giant chandeliers. Balls were flying everywhere nearly hitting the expensive fixtures. The players were performing at a high tempo occasionally skinning themselves on the unforgiving carpet. Tony utilized humor to guide the session and keep the team focused and motivated. He could have stopped the session to correct players' mistakes but he chose to let the skill evolve while he utilized hilarious remarks to keep everyone engaged and focused. Tony's humorous comments did not come across as sarcasm but rather a guided correction without stopping play. The session flowed nicely and both the players and audience came away informed and motivated. 

The Use of Criticism?
Correcting technique is part of coaching. We have to find smart ways to help players improve. Tony is an experienced senior coach who never stopped play when a player did something wrong. This is a skill Tony has learned. Constant criticisms can be devastating to players. When we are coaching young people, the goal is to build self-esteem, self-confidence and help players to internalize motivation. All coaches want to have players coach themselves. The self-confidence you need to coach yourself is learned and built gradually over the course of a career. 

If players experience constant failure or too much criticism, they will experience negative emotions, practice at half speed and eventually lose interest in the game. You have seen the cycle of destruction stall a player's development and take the joy out of the game. Often the player will perceive the coach being negative toward them or think they are being unfairly singled out. Players tend to close their ears to this type of criticism. When players become isolated, they become emotionally fragile and their confidence is poor. This is a bad cycle for players to enter. If a player's motivation is decreased, then even simple skills become difficult. Players can feel this loss of touch and confidence decreases. This negative cycle begins to feed off of itself and can be very difficult to break. 

Are You a Negative Coach?
If you were to ask a coach if they communicate with positive or negative instructions, most coaches would indicate they are primarily positive communicators. For example, a coach may say that their communication content is 80% positive, 20% negative. If you were to ask their players the same question, they respond by stating the coach is 40% positive and 60% negative. These differences between players' and coaches' perceptions are common and illustrate how we need to observe and train our communication skills. 

The best way for coaches to learn their style is to employ observation tools. Observation tools are frequently utilized when training working professionals. Teachers, doctors and many other professions employ the use of observation tools to improve communication. It's really not that difficult. The uses of audio, videotape and peer review are common techniques to identify and develop skilled coaches. Frank Smoll a sport psychologist presenting at the Fair spoke about the role of positive coaching. He indicated positive coaching helped players to enjoy the game and continue to improve. It's good advice to train and develop sound communication skills.

Why does Positive Coaching Help?
Most coaches have adapted the popular role of the coach as the central leader and motivators of the team. This is the traditional role our sport culture has adopted from formal business and military organizations. The old time role of the coach was to make all the decisions and centralize authority and information. This model served its time but is being replaced by a more effective design. Business has adopted a flat, more flexible design with less authority on the leader and more responsibility on the individual. Most effective teams are now powered by all the players maximizing their roles to perfection. When the team goals, individual roles and communication are clear, the team can take on the world. It's exciting to see these "empowered" teams play, and they are fun to be around. 

The Coach as a Role Model
That brings us back to Tony DiCicco again. The U-15 girls were charged up and motivated to learn from a national team coach. Tony responded by being prepared, professional, and a master communicator.  When coaches are skilled, they provide expectations for players technically as well an example of how adults are supposed to act. Coaches are central role models. When children are young, the family is the primary source of support and information for the youngster. At this stage the parents are role models. When players reach age 11-12, the peer group begins to take a more central role as the primary influence. As coaches, you are often placed in the situation where you are perhaps the most influential person in the world of some players. This is a fantastic responsibility for the coach. Depending on your choice of words and behavior, you can influence a player to become more confident and take control of their motivation or you can destroy a player's self-esteem to the point where they give up training and quit the game.

The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy 
One of the most powerful tools you have as the coach is the principle of the self-fulfilling prophecy. When you provide positive information to a player they build a healthy self-esteem and actually believe they are what you say they are. They begin to act the way they think. If you tell an 8-year-old player, they are great shooters they are more likely to go home and practice shooting in the garage because they think they are good at it. That's because you helped to shape a young persons' image about themselves. Reality is what they think, and they think they are great shooters. The self-fulfilling prophecy can work negatively as well. If you tell players they are slow, fat and stupid, don't expect them to come to practice early to be abused.  They will tend to avoid that situation. We all want players to be happy, skillful and motivated. There are smart ways to motivate and help players on their journey. Next month we will examine the powerful effects of the self-fulfilling prophecy in detail.

Quiz
Now it's game time. Lets see what you have learned by taking this true or false quiz.
1.  Most of our communication is nonverbal...                                                      True     False
2.  Humor is a desired trait in skillful coaching...                                                  True     False 
3.  Coaches often overestimate their communication effectiveness...                      True     False
4.  Constant coaching corrections make players tough...                                       True    False 
5.  The coach should be the central leader of the team...                                         True    False

Answers: 1=True   2=True   3=True   4=False   5=False